Dr. Wayne Dyer

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Problems with the Law of attraction

Smarky

29-10-2004 05:22:26

Hey people,

As i try to find my way in life and make sense of everything, things are a little testing at the moment, but a worry I have is the law of attraction. If i'm having negative thoughts then I'm going to attract more negativity into my life?

The problem is when I try to act all happy etc, I can do it for awhile until something knocks me down and when it does I tend to become more negative that i would have been if i had not been trying to act happy. Then i will take the attitude "This is stupid, everything sucks", even if i have these thoughts for a few short days then I'm still starting a lot of problems?

gypsyjaye

29-10-2004 07:31:54

Hi!

It is a simple fact of reality that what you think about is what expands. It is very, very, very simple.

My own problems arise when I begin to think, "This isn't what I wanted to manifest. I wanted it to be THIS way." It can be difficult to detach from the outcome, especially when you have a vivid imagination like mine. LOL! My outlook on this lifetime is to see the world around me, my home, my job, my friends, my child, EVERYTHING is simply lessons for me to expand my spiritual self.

I express my thoughts by using examples, so please excuse if this sounds like a sermon..... lol

When Wayne says that you are manifesting your destiny, I believe that it is a paradigm. You are manifesting, but you're manifesting at the level of your soul, not the level of the mind that sees the world around us.
For instance, when I'm experiencing financial difficulties, if I REALLY look, I'll find that actually I'm experiencing issues of insecurity or not being free.

What happens is that I WANT to experience security, but I don't FEEL it. I FEEL insecure and what is showing up in my bank account is reflecting that. The paradigm is that when I starting FEELING secure, more money shows up in my bank account. How? A bank error, an unexpected gift, a chance to make some "fast cash" doing what I love, etc. etc. And if I watch it very closely, I realize that it happens EVERY time. Now I'm not always a master at SEEING it, but show up it does, especially when I'm willing to admit that maybe it isn't showing up the exact way I wanted.
For me, this exists in my life on ALL levels - relationships, finances, work, etc.

It's all a balance. When I'm more loving, I feel more loved. When I'm more generous, I feel more abundant. When I'm more tired, I feel more depressed. When I'm more.....more....more - it's doesn't matter what it is, I'll simply feel more of whatever I'm sending out there.

How do I change how I'm feeling? I connect to my Source/God. I (still) have issues with religion and the words they use to describe this Source/God, so I've made it simple for me and just call it Universe. I'm not all lofty and estorteric; I really believe that the outside Universe is connected to my Inside Self. Whenever I'm feeling confused or negative, if I take the time to hone in on my outside Universe - not just the thoughts in my head - I'll connect very shortly to my Higher Self.

I connect to the Universe. Just the connection is enough to change the way I feel. And I can connect at any time, just by focusing on this moment and this moment alone. When I connect to God, I can hear - really hear - the laughter of a child, a bee happily buzzing about a flower, or see Him in a brief second of meeting the eyes of a stranger in the supermarket. When you connect, you get excited. Yep, there's no other word for it - EXCITED!!! You begin to see how many of these moments you can have because they are so blissful. When you stop expecting them to show up the way you want and just begin to HAVE them, you'll realize that your destiny will manifest itself.

And, yes - I know....groan, groan, groan..... roll we all teach what we most need to learn. Thanks for the lesson this morning. Apparently, I needed to hear it so badly the Universe woke me up before 300a.m.

Namaste ~
Jaye

Smarky

08-11-2004 15:44:25

it's a horrible law though, I'm trying so hard now for what seems like forever and I just feel tired and worn down.

I really really just wanna stop and give in, break down for a bit but I know if i do that things will never get anybetter and i will just attract more of that. It's really difficult. Somehow I have to have faith in that which hasn't produced the results I want, only made them tougher.

Thanks for the challenge P

chris knight

08-11-2004 19:04:31

it's a horrible law though, I'm trying so hard now for what seems like forever and I just feel tired and worn down.

What are you talking about?

What is a "horrible law" and why do you say that?

Somehow I have to have faith in that which hasn't produced the results I want, only made them tougher.

What specifically has not produced the results you wanted?

Which results are you seeking specifically, if I may ask ?

Smarky

09-11-2004 01:15:49

It's a horrible law because if you get upset and slip into unhappyness your just going to create more of that unhappyness. So it's like if you want to change things you somehow have to stay happy with the current until you get what you require.

What do I want? To be happier and out of this place were it's a struggle at the moment, for achivement in what I'm doing at the moment. Security and freedom and to be able to work harder.

chris knight

09-11-2004 06:38:34

It's a horrible law because if you get upset and slip into unhappyness your just going to create more of that unhappyness. So it's like if you want to change things you somehow have to stay happy with the current until you get what you require.

Try this exercise

Consciously choose everything for 1 day. Choose how you're going to feel, what you're going to do, who you're going to do it with, etc.

idea I want you to remember that you have the power to choose how you're going to feel every waking moment of your life.

Smarky

09-11-2004 07:00:18

Yea, this is what i'm going to try and do but it's difficult. When i'm feeling tired it's harder, when i'm tired I can't simply choose not to be because I still tend to feel it.

chris knight

09-11-2004 07:04:24

Yea, this is what i'm going to try and do but it's difficult. When i'm feeling tired it's harder, when i'm tired I can't simply choose not to be because I still tend to feel it.

Perhaps it's time to examine the payoff you're getting by not choosing how you want to feel every moment of the day.

I don't know the answers that are right for you, but perhaps you might find answers by heading into the gym and getting physically active whenever you are feeling "not happy"...

Smarky

09-11-2004 08:49:45

I don't know, I just try to figure everything out and keep moving forward. I feel a lot of pressure to perform and I have so much work to get done even though I continue to move forward I believe I consistently work far less productively than I should. I find that and my general dislike for myself I get at certain times and anger when i don't seem to be moving forward as the problem.

Smarky

09-11-2004 14:54:49

Thank you for your input )

Don't mind me, I question things too much, i'm searching for answers, i'm good at finding the questions just not the answers. I'm in a struggle at the moment as I try to find the next way forward. I feel a little isolated sometimes as a lot of people that I know have no idea what i'm talking about, but there all to happy to accept something that I will never.

I'm a strange 21 year old i guess P

Ron

12-11-2004 11:44:48

smarky "I don't know, I just try to figure everything out and keep moving forward. I feel a lot of pressure to perform and I have so much work to get done even though I continue to move forward I believe I consistently work far less productively than I should. I find that and my general dislike for myself I get at certain times and anger when i don't seem to be moving forward as the problem."

How about you stepping back and looking at you in action? What do you see? You see someone who wants to control and gets frustrated when they can't (try to figure everything out) and (feel lots of pressure). You think you are moving forward but you see yourself actually standing still - firmly planted in one spot. What could be holding you there? Could it be that you can not let go of what you don't know? Could it be that you do not like yourself where you are at, but have not talked to yourself about it? And then, not liking you, you are unable to like others, and your relationships start to suck?

smarky "I question things too much, i'm searching for answers, i'm good at finding the questions just not the answers. I'm in a struggle at the moment as I try to find the next way forward. I feel a little isolated sometimes as a lot of people that I know have no idea what i'm talking about, but there all to happy to accept something that I will never."

Did you know that within every question lies the answer? Why do you suppose you don't see the answers? Could be you are too focused on the questions. How about spending the next hour of your life simply accepting everything you see without placing a value on it? When we place no value on anything, we are unable to question anything? And begin by accepting you just where you are and how you are. Sit with yourself and discuss what you don't like about you - and then reverse those comments into positive statements - and the answers will appear. Life is what you make it, not what others make it for you - they really can't make life for you! If life is what you hope it would be, then you have to get back to the drawing board and see why not.

Namaste - Ron

lindamiller

16-11-2004 00:17:53

Hello Smarky,

I just joined this forum because I found that the humble moderator here had posted something from my blog. I don't even know how you do that... but I know there are no coincidences. Thank you Chris.

Anyway, I read your comments about your frustration with the Law of Attraction. The Law of Attraction is perfect and never changes. It will never fail you. It always delivers what you are focusing on. You get what you think about whether you want it or not.

Again, you get what you think about whether you want it or not.

It sounds to me like you're just trying too hard. Let go. Surrender. Give in. Detach from the outcome.

You know what you want, right? If not, the first thing is to get very clear on what you DO want and do not even think about what you don't want.

Ask for what you want and let it go. Pretend you have it until you do. Find a thought that feels good - and use that thought every time you feel negative about anything.

Just find one good thought - a favorite moment from any time in your life. Close your eyes and FEEEEEL that thought, smell it, taste it, own it. Use that good feeling thought to replace any negative thought that creeps into your mind. Practice. Pretend. Fake it til you make it.

It works. Let us know how you're doing. There's more.

Smarky

16-11-2004 08:27:13

Hey,

So I take the intention that I wish to have and then I put my intention out into the world then act and understand that I have it?

I have ADD and I find it really difficult sometimes to concentrate, I have a lot of stuff I need to do and I really need to work hard but sometimes it is just really difficult, that is certainly what I want to be able to achive, to be able to focus better and to work really hard!

If I am to act like I do work hard and I am focused what happens at the end of the day that i haven't?

chris knight

16-11-2004 08:38:47

I just joined this forum because I found that the humble moderator here had posted something from my blog. I don't even know how you do that... but I know there are no coincidences. Thank you Chris.

Linda,

I'll tell ya my secret

I get updated any time "wayne dyer" is mentioned on any blog anywhere because I subscribe to various blog/RSS search engines. www.Feedster.com for example.

I get updated any time "wayne dyer" is mentioned on any new website propertly that is indexed by Google and Yahoo because I subscribe to both of their news-alert reporting features. For advanced search reporting, I use GoogleAlerts.

Usually I'm alerted within 1-3 hours of a new mention.

Another secret

The reason I am able to keep this board clean is that I am alerted within 1 minute every single time there is a post. You can get access to the same thing via the RSS feed that is setup for this board

http://wayne-dyer.inspiresyou.com/rss.php

Ron

16-11-2004 15:38:23

Smarky wrote "I have ADD and I find it really difficult sometimes to concentrate, I have a lot of stuff I need to do and I really need to work hard but sometimes it is just really difficult, that is certainly what I want to be able to achive, to be able to focus better and to work really hard!
If I am to act like I do work hard and I am focused what happens at the end of the day that i haven't?"

There is no need to concentrate on the intention you have placed in the Universe. Just know it is there and then get on with what you must do - work hard and stay focus on what you must get done. Let the Universe take care of the rest.

Namaste - Ron

Smarky

16-11-2004 15:44:44

Hey,

thank you! I meant that my intention is to be focused and not my focus on the intention.

So I just declare that I wish for this certain thing to show up in my life and then i become it until it does? Do you only need to declare this once for a few short seconds or do i keep declaring it on a certain timeframe?

Ron

16-11-2004 15:54:52

You wrote "So I just declare that I wish for this certain thing to show up in my life and then i become it until it does? Do you only need to declare this once for a few short seconds or do i keep declaring it on a certain timeframe?"

If you believe in what you are doing, then once is enough. If you did it more it would appear you don't believe in what you are doing or you don't trust the Universe - or both.

And then simply let it go and get on with your life.

Namaste - Ron

powwow

03-04-2005 11:33:28

I'd like to see you back off a little from that belief that your negative thoughts are guaranteed to create negative experience. This is not necessarily true, or at least it is not true to the extent that a positive state of mind will attract more positive experience.

Positivity -- love -- is WAY stronger than negativity. Why? Because positivity -- love -- is the Truth. What I'd like to see you do is detach from these negative thoughts -- let them drift on by -- and cultivate the non-specific feeling that all is well right here and right now. Don't attempt to attach that feeling to whatever item or state you're trying to attract; rather, allow it to encompass all you're aware of. Let it remind you that all IS well right here and now. And everything you need IS available as you know it.

Pow

polterfishy

19-04-2005 15:03:57

I, too, have problems with the laws of attraction. So many negative things have happened to me the past two weeks, that I'm wondering what I did or thought to attract this to me. I'm doing my best to remain in intention and see the good in all that has happened as a hidden blessing from the universe, but it is very difficult not to want to control everything in my circumstances and surroundings. How do you strike the balance between wanting to control, and just letting go?
Am I right in assuming that if I put my positive intentions out there, that it will in time happen?

Ron

19-04-2005 19:42:55

If negative experiences are not negative thoughts, then what and where do they come from? And the same goes for the positive as well. But, do you really know the difference at times between the two? Are you listening to yourself - aware of what words you are using - what emphasis you are placing on certain words. And do you use the word "not" in you intentioins - the mind does not comprehend 'not'.

I agree that everything we need is here right now - we lack nothing. But do we truly believe in this statement? If so, why then do we have to be concerned about our intentions?

If negative happenings are occuring to you, you must admit that you have brought them to you, because there is no way they come on their own. What you hold in your mind, even unconsciously, is coming to you. You want to see the good in everything and yet are having difficulty in trying hard not to control it. What this says to me, is that you have not let go of the intention at all. You are still holding it with the thought that you want it to appear as such and such and no other way. This is where you surrender your thoughts to Spirit - where you quit trying to run your life your way and accept life as it will be presented to you. And if you get out of the way, life will be presented to you in all the splendor you could imagine. Instead of intending, intending, intending - with the hidden phrase that I want all this my way - just show gratitude for what you have and you will soon see that you have more to be grateful for constantly. Thanking God in advance for what we believe we want will bring it to us quicker than us going over some intention like a matra - repeating it over and over. You have All That Is - open yourself to it all and say thanks.

Namaste - Ron

celia

19-04-2005 22:05:47

Ron,

I have to admit that I sometimes don't understand your messages to me and others. However I am very grateful for them. I read and reread them to get more clear on what you are saying. You seem to have an ability to forget the past. I don't know if I agree completely. I do agree that we are "now here" and to live in the moment does honor to God, but I firmly feel that without examining the past in a detached way, people can be "doomed" to repeat it. That, and the fact that there are certain moments I revisit, like swinging on my swing as a child totally in the moment, looking into my husband's eyes when we married, the birth of my daughter, these were moments when I had the highest energy, the purest connection, the most life changing love. These thoughts help me rid my mind of negative ones. There is value in revisiting the past, the positive pieces of a past. That is my belief.
I do appreciate your messages, truly, I guess I just wanted to state mine. All roads lead to Rome, your road might be faster, but my road is my own.
Please keep writing to me , it is good to consider such a departure from my own process and I will stay open minded.

Ron

20-04-2005 08:44:52

When we talk of the past as never happening, we are just saying that the past was nothing but thoughts then as the present also is. We all have memories of the past - some beautiful, some not so beautiful. What we have come to realize is that we can how we view those past thoughts - particularly the not-so-good ones. We all carry with us some thoughts from that past that we just can't seem to let go of - some fear perhaps, some hatred even, some madness that continues to haunt us. These unloving thoughts hinder us in living in the moment. A lot of argument comes about when we say that any 'negative' thought of the past can be turned into a 'positive' thought - meaning we can stop seeing the hate, the fear and the madness. We can see beyond those appearances to what was being presented to us then, and accept it now. What this does is give a peace that flows over us. No longer will those thoughts hang onto us. We give them up - we let go of them - for the thoughts we now hold of love.

What we try to do in our daily lives is to not live our past over, because simply we cannot. We can have similar thoughts, but circumstances are no longer present that appeared then. We 'learn' from the past but we choose not to live there. Did you ever think that every judgment you make throughout your day comes from a past thought? Try being in your day without a judgment - try seeing anything and everything as if for the first time - not judging it but simply being with it. This is a wonderful experience. And when you are in this mode - you will not being using a past that never really was nor project those thoughts to a future that is yet to be. The future is based on the past - the present is without either.

We all have those memories of love that we experienced in our life. But those memories are there to remind us of what love has to offer us now. We think those were the greatest of times, but open yourself to what is before you now. Step into the present and taste the sweetness of joy, experience the wonders of love, explore the recesses of your world.

Namaste - Ron

celia

20-04-2005 18:22:02

That was truly beautiful Ron, poetic even. Thank you, I am grateful.

Today is my daughter's 6th birthday and we took a trip to see some waterfalls. I had never seen one. The walking was hard physically, even though I walk every day, it was a lot uphill and I was really gasping for air, as I am healing from Major surgery. At one point I became sad about how limited I am still physically, now. When I told my husband how I felt my husband said, "You should feel proud. You're out here doing this and can enjoy it just as much as everyone else here. " This is what you're talking about isn't it? Am I getting your message?
So I changed my thought and I began saying things like to myself like "Good for you!" and reminded myself that I am healing and that I am healthy and can become healthier still.

Last night I had a nightmare after I wrote to you. I think I was rejecting you and felt guilty, and I feel sometimes so frustrated at what seems like a lack of progress, not physically so much but emotionally. So I remind myself that I am exactly where I need to be and that God will work for me and with me. I seek out support and change my thoughts on a constant basis to help rewire my brain and spirit.

I don't want to harbor resentment towards people at my job, to which I may return in two weeks. I am asking for help to learn how to accept others as they are and when I say others I really mean me. I would never berate my daughter or anyone else for that matter for not being able to hike the waterfalls, yet I did do that to me . But the growth for me is that I stopped and changed my thought and enjoyed God's voice in the water and his touch in the cool breeze and my daughter's pure joy at being six.

I have been reading the strands on forgiveness and accepting others as they are. I know it begins with me. So I am intending on embracing my imperfection as a perfect child of God. But I find it hard and I have real pain around it. Writing this I am in tears. Self esteem was not my background but I hurt myself when I don't become self esteem. Thanks Ron for listening.
-Celia-

Mr. Scott

21-04-2005 17:30:37

I read the last post and wanted to say thanks to Ron. What he said really hit home. Iím currently getting out of a relationship, and while I have a pretty decent attitude toward the whole thing my stubborn olí brain keeps pulling me toward negativity. There have been times in which Iíve felt really good since weíve split Ė like Iím totally optimistic and enthusiastic (grateful even) about what the future holds and I really feel in tune with spirit, intention, whatever...; but other times I get down about what isnít in my life anymore Ė and I know thatís wrong. I think Iíve learned the lessons I need to from the relationship, but nonetheless I feel Iím in a bit of a funk... When Iíve felt the best though is when Iíve let the past be the past and havenít let it effect (or even better ďinfectĒ) my attitude in the present. I could ramble on about how dwelling on the past can cause immobilization or whatever, but the way Ron just articulated it is as good as it gets. I especially like the part about not judging things, because coming out of a relationship itís hard not to judge everything (um yeah, girls..., the one I split up with was totally foxy Ė which makes it even worse...) against what was. That pesky judgmental mindset closes you off to opportunities the universe is willing to provide (as long as youíre open to them). Anyways, Ronís post was a bulls eye and Iím going to print it off and put it in my wallet. Thanks Ron Ė and I apologize to all for rambling, but Iím in a pretty good mood now.

Ron

21-04-2005 20:43:15

Thank you for you kind words as well. It is always a joy to read of post of positive happenings.

Namaste - Ron